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Q: What do you call a gay dinosaur?
A: Mega-saur-ass

Q: Why are pubic Hairs so curly?
A: So they donít poke her eye out.

Q: Why did god invent alcohol?
A: So fat women can get laid too.

Q: What do a gynecologist, and a pizza delivery guy have in common?
A: They both can smell it, but they can't eat it!

Q: What's the difference between a G-Spot and a golf ball?
A: A guy will actually search for a golf ball.

Three Hundred Percent
A lady goes to her doctor, complaining that her husband is 300% impotent. The doctor says, "Iím not sure I get what you are trying to say." She says, "Well, the first 100% you can imagine. Plus, he burned his tongue and broke his fingers!"

Appointment Tomorrow
One night, as a couple lay down for bed, the husband gently taps his wife on the shoulder and starts rubbing her arm. The wife turns over and says: "I'm sorry honey, I've got a gynecologist appointment tomorrow and I want to stay fresh." The husband, rejected, turns over and tries to sleep. A few minutes later, he rolls back over and taps his wife again. This time he whispers in her ear: "Do you have a dentist appointment tomorrow too?"

Brutal Divorce
Mickey and Minnie Mouse are in the middle of a divorce. "Mickey," the judge says, "Minnie seems quite normal to me. I can't grant you a divorce just because you think she's crazy."
"I didn't say she was crazy," exclaims Mickey. "I said she was f*cking Goofy."

Not A Good Day
A cop was patrolling the highway when he sees a man tied up to a tree. The officer stops and goes near the guy. "Whatís going on here?" he asks. The man cries, "I was driving and helped out a hitchhiker. He pulled a gun on me, robbed me, took all my money, my clothes, my car and then tied me up to this tree!" The cop looked at the guy for a moment, and then pulled down his pants and whipped out his penis. "I guess this isnít your lucky day, pal!"

A teacher asked a girl to use the word "handsome" in a sentence.
The girl says, "When I s*ck my boyfriendís d*ck my jaws get really tired so I use my handsome times"


50 Funniest Short Dirty Jokes!

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