Q: What's the difference
between your job and a dead prostitute?
A: Your job still sucks!
Q: What do you call a lesbian dinosaur
A: A lickalotopis
Q: What do the Mafia and a pussy have in common?
A: One slip of the tongue, and you're in deep shit.
Q: What's 6 inches long, 2 inches wide and drives
A: a $100 bill!
Q: Why did the snowman smile?
A: Because the snowblower is coming.
A mother walks into her daughter’s room with a condom in her
hand, "I found this while cleaning your drawers today. Are
you sexually active?" The daughter replies, "No, I just lay
A guy meets a hooker in a bar. She says, "This is your lucky
night. I've got a special offer for you. I'll do absolutely
anything you want for $300, as long as you can say it in
The guy replies, "Hey, why not?" He pull his wallet out of
his pocket, and one at a time lays three hundred-dollar
bills on the bar, and says slowly, "Paint my house."
A businessman boards a flight and is lucky enough to be
seated next to an absolutely gorgeous woman. They exchange
brief hellos and he notices she is reading a manual about
sexual statistics. He asks her about it and she replies,
"This is a very interesting book about sexual statistics. It
identifies that American Indians have the longest average
penis and Polish men have the biggest average diameter. By
the way, my name is Jill. What's yours?" He coolly replies,
"Tonto Kawalski, nice to meet you.
A man and a woman started to have sex in the middle of a
dark forest. After about 15 minutes of it, the man finally
gets up and says, "Damn, I wish I had a flashlight!". The
woman says, "Me too, you've been eating grass for the past
A daughter asked her mother how to spell penis, her mom said
you should have asked me last night it was at the tip of my