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Q: What's 50' long and smells of urine?
A: A line dance at a retirement village.

Q: What's the difference between erotic and kinky?
A: Erotic is when you use a feather. Kinky is when you use the whole chicken.

Q: What is the best definition of a mixed emotion?
A: Watching the mother-in-law reverse off a cliff driving your brand new car.

Q: How is a lawyer different from a hooker?
A: There are some things a hooker just won't do.

Q: What is the ultimate rejection?
A: When you’re masturbating and your hand falls asleep.

Q: What horse never comes out in the daytime?
A: A night mare

Q: What is a man's view of safe sex?
A: A padded head board.

Q: How can a woman shoot and hang her husband and not go to jail?
A: The womans a photographer

Q: What's green and smells like pork?
A: Kermit the Frog's finger.

Q: Why is divorce so expensive?
A: Because it's worth it



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